Making Peace with Being Single: Finding Emotional Support and Love Everywhere
“And let a smile spread through the heart area. Smiling into the heart. It’s not to cover over what’s there but rather to create that space…” — Tara Brach
How many times have you felt like something was missing because you weren't in a romantic relationship? If you're nodding right now, you're not alone. But here's what I've learned: emotional support doesn't come with a relationship status requirement.
The Beauty of Being Solo (And Actually Loving It)
There's something magical that happens when you stop running from your own company and start embracing it.
Those quiet Saturday mornings when you can do exactly what you want? That's not settling; that's self-love in action.
Whether it's getting lost in a good book, diving into a creative project, or taking that meditative walk you've been putting off, these moments teach us something powerful about who we are
What's Does Emotional Support feel like in Friendship?
Emotional support really shines in friendships that feel like home. You know the ones I'm talking about. The friends who celebrate your wins like they're their own, who sit with you through the messy stuff, and who remind you of your worth when you forget it yourself.
When your friend starts glowing about their new relationship, and you feel that genuine excitement for them? That's love, too.
It's the kind of love that builds community and reminds us we're all in this together. This is something that comes up a lot in life coaching—learning to find joy in others' success instead of comparing our behind-the-scenes to their highlight reel.
Emotional Support: Your Friends as Your Chosen Family
Being single isn’t something to endure; it’s something to live in. But that’s hard to remember when the world keeps telling you that love, real love, only comes in one form: romantic love. The kind that ends in a shared lease, a joint holiday card, and someone next to you when you wake up.
For many people, especially those seeking queer affirming therapy, understanding that chosen family can be just as meaningful (sometimes more so) than biological family is a game changer.
These moments of connection—where vulnerability is welcomed—form an emotional safety net. Each thread of support, whether big or small, weaves into something steady and beautiful. It’s emotional support in motion, lived and felt in real time.
Shifting Your Love Lens
Instead of focusing on what's missing, what if we celebrated what's already here? This mindset shift (from scarcity to abundance) changes everything.
Suddenly, you start noticing love everywhere: in the barista who remembers your order, in the coworker who checks in on you, in the way your pet greets you at the door.
For those working with queer affirming therapy professionals, this reframing can be especially important. You might ask yourself:
If I were to never have the sort of love I’m looking for, at least I still get to…
• Anticipate a crush with a best friend and be so excited to meet them because they’ve found their person and I’ve got a new friend.
• Make best friends with a five-year-old, the kind of love that’s pure, uncomplicated and playful.
• Teach someone to cook meatballs the way mom makes them, passing down love through food.
• Be surprised, over and over again, by someone I love’s capacity for kindness and growth, despite everything they’ve been through.
Finding Your Emotional Support System
So what if, instead of measuring our lives by what we don’t have, we smiled—not to pretend we’re fine, but to create space for everything that is already here? (to paraphrase Tara Brach).
What if we leaned into every kind of love that already exists?
Because whether or not partnership finds us, we still get to fill our lives with love. In friendships, in teaching, in learning, and in witnessing each other.
But always remember this: you don't have to figure it out alone. Emotional support comes in many forms, and there's no shame in seeking it out. Sometimes the most radical thing you can do is admit you're whole on your own while still being open to all the different ways love can show up in your life.
So, you're not missing out on love. You're surrounded by it. Sometimes we just need to adjust our focus to see it clearly. So don’t wait. Don’t hold your breath for one kind of love when the world is offering you so many others. Let yourself create space for all of it.
